Recently, a client told me that they’ve been struggling with making decisions. When pressed for what kinds of decisions, she said, “For anything. Everything I have to do in my day.” She detailed things like trying to decide what to eat, to where to go for the spare hour she had before a workout class, to when to get out of bed, to what to wear. She felt like each decision was heavy. Additionally, they never seemed to stop piling on at every moment.

As I listened, I nodded, leaning in towards her to say “Girl, that sounds like burnout.”

She groaned, sagging into her chair. “I can’t be burnt out, Heather! It’s only January.”

I quipped, “What, does New Years usually wipe your slate clean, somehow? Did I miss the ‘get out of exhaustion free’ card?”

She laughed. “Well…no, but I just don’t want to be dealing with this already in 2026.”

We lamented together that humans have yet to figure out how to conveniently schedule our mental breakdowns.

Why This Burnout Went Unnoticed

I tell the story of this conversation because it led us to something really interesting that has been sticking with me ever since. My client didn’t even recognize what was happening to her as burnout because she’d experienced burnout before. But this time, neither the causes nor the symptoms of what her previous kinds of burnout looked like were identical here. In some ways, being so sure she knew what burnout was supposed to present like let this one slip through the cracks, unnoticed.

In the past, burnout came with a packed schedule that lingered too long. Or it included physically pushing herself and her sleep schedule in ways that began to hurt. She hadn’t been doing any of that recently. In fact, she had even gotten some extra rest when visiting family over the holidays.

Mental Exhaustion Versus Physical Burnout

But what she had been busy with was making a lot of decisions. She had been planning more deeply with pointed, quality work that held more weight than it had the year before. Also, she was holding space for emotional turmoil for multiple people in her life. She was taking on a lot of decision responsibility that juggled schedules and moving parts.

“It’s no wonder making decisions is hard right now. You’re mentally exhausted. Before, you were burnt out physically. But burnout can come from any aspect of our life, and right now, it sounds like yours is from that mental exhaustion,” I told her.

This kind of realization is often part of the healing process. It can be especially true for people learning how healing and resilience are built slowly rather than through pushing harder.

The Self Criticism That Burnout Thrives On

Instead of compassion for an exhausted self, she found herself simply getting frustrated and berating herself every time she stumbled over the things she felt she should be doing easily. This is a pattern that burnout loves to try and trick us into, because it tends to feed the burnout further. In the end, it allows it to grow fat and content inside of us as it siphons away our energy.

Interrupting this pattern is vital. Even I, someone who catches burnout in others and gives this feedback often, am shocked every time at the difference it makes to interrupt this pattern in myself. In particular, being able to recognize that I’m exhausted and to give myself space to not be perfect at something for a while makes an incredible difference for me.

What the Struggle Might Be Asking For

Even if you are not sure whether the word burnout applies to you right now, you may recognize the frustration. You may notice the anger or harshness toward yourself when something feels harder than it should. If that sounds familiar, either now or in the past, it may be worth wondering what allowing the word burnout to apply might change for you.

What areas of your life feel hardest right now? Physical labor. Getting out of bed. Continually snoozing your alarm. Making decisions. Handling emotions that feel heightened or overwhelming.

Whatever it is, consider what that struggle might be trying to tell you. What might it be communicating that you need right now.

This kind of reflection is often supported best through supportive therapy. There, the focus is on steadiness, compassion, and emotional safety rather than pushing for quick fixes

What would it mean to approach that need with grace.