The Montfort Group


Therapy With Me May Help You Manage Your Divorce

Meeting with a therapist who specializes in high-conflict divorce can really help by allowing you to feel accepted and supported as you learn to detach emotionally from your ex and feel more in control of your life.

We help people who are considering divorce, are going through divorce, or have a high-conflict divorce that never seems to get any better. We recognize that many divorces will never be amicable and many exes will not be able to co-parent effectively.

If this is your situation, we will validate your experience and give you a space to process your frustrations about not having the kind of divorce other people tell you that you could have.

Our approach is active and directive. We combine mindfulness techniques and solution-focused therapy to give you tools to manage your relationship with your ex and feel sane again.

We will help you learn how Parallel Parenting may lessen your conflict with your ex. Together, we’ll explore ways to get “unstuck” from dysfunctional patterns with your ex, approach your divorce with healthy detachment, and move on with your life.

What It’s Like Living With High-Conflict Divorce

Living with high-conflict divorce can be exhausting.

- You may feel anger, frustration, and fear on a daily basis.

- You may also be struggling with depression, anxiety, physical ailments, and panic attacks.

- Your painful feelings may have taken up all the space in your head, so you have trouble focusing on your children, your job, your friends, and the good things things in life.

- You want to stop worrying about your divorce and you want strategies on how to deal with an ex who never “gets over it” but you don’t know how to do these things.

Most People Don’t Understand High-Conflict Divorce

High-conflict divorce occurs when two people are unable to psychologically disentangle themselves. Their divorce and custody arrangement may have been settled long ago, but one or both parties have never gone through the “emotional divorce.”

They stay locked in battle when one or both engages in hostile email communication, seemingly unending litigation, breaking court orders, and putting kids in the middle. They are not bad people; they just have trouble regulating their emotions and they lack effective conflict resolution skills.

Individuals challenged by high-conflict divorce often feel shame because they can’t do what friends, family, divorce books, and even some therapists tell them to do: “get over it” and become amicable co-parents.

This makes them feel that they have failed because they don’t have the good divorce that everyone assures them they can have if they just do A, B, and C. They feel misunderstood by parenting coordinators and therapists. The shame they experience makes dealing with a difficult ex even more difficult.

As your therapist, we will validate your experience. We will never tell you that you can turn a bad divorce into a good one by “taking the high road” or that you can co-parent effectively when you’re in a situation where this is unlikely. What we will do is help you accept what you can’t change and focus on what you can.

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It's easy to set up an appointment with us - see what's available now!

Schedule Online

It's easy to set up an appointment with us - see what's available now!
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