December 21, 2000
In therapy and out, there is perhaps no more talked about emotional malady than depression, and no form of therapy more prevalent than depression therapy. Everyone experiences depression in some way, some much more than others (Major Depression and Dysthymic Disorder are other terms given to specific varieties of depression). Depression therapy is often what people think of when they think of therapy, period.
Yet in providing therapy for depression in our Plano therapy office, as well as online via Telehealth, there is a paradox: It seems clear that what everyone is experiencing–what everyone means when they refer to depression in therapy couldn’t possibly be the same thing. Depression means so many different things. And yet we rarely question just what is meant by depression in our ordinary conversations in the world and in the high-stakes conversations that take place in therapy. Here are a few examples one might hear if you listened in on a session for depression:
“I’ve been really depressed since I lost my job.”
“I have struggled with depression my whole life.”
“I find my job really depressing.”
“My depression has been really terrible lately.”
“My mother has been depressed since my father passed away.”
It’s hard not to talk about depression therapy without talking about anti-depressants. Many people find them remarkably helpful. Others have an insignificant or even a negative experience with them. We’re pretty neutral on the subject of psychiatric medications in general–if they’re helpful, if you’re open to their help and you can tolerate the side effects, great. Plenty of our clients in therapy take medication, others do not. In some instances, we raise it as a topic of interest but never push the issue.
We are big fans of feeling better. We’ve all had our share of miserable times and wouldn’t wish for anyone to stay stuck in depression. The hard part is that you can’t take on depression in therapy without looking at the overall task of creating your life. What makes this so challenging is that you’ve got to create a less depressing life even as you’re feeling (perhaps incredibly) depressed! As impossible as it may seem, getting out of depression involves getting up, getting showered and dressed, making plans, being in touch, going on dates, finding a better job–in short, it involves doing all of those things that seem impossible for the very reason that you’re depressed!
It seems impossible, we know. But it isn’t. It may hurt like hell for a while. It may seem terrifying. But you’ve got to do it anyway. Our job is to work hard to help make it possible for you to put one foot in front of the other.
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